Posted by: slcsln2010 | January 18, 2011

Square 1, or rather square -1.

Looks like I am back at the beginning.  Again.  2 months into my journey and stress got to me and I let it defeat me.  If there were a title match between me and the holidays the holidays would be wearing the belt with me in the corner licking my wounds.  Wait, I still am licking my wounds.  Then there was all of the travelling I did and not making healthy choices during the trips, as well as other things to raise my anxiety and stress.  So what did I do?  Turned to food.  Yummy, delicious, not-good-for-me food. I gained back what I lost and a few (just a few) extra.

My question to me is how do I deal with everything that is going on?  How do I not feel guilty for not being there to help my mom?  She had surgery that hinders her from doing just about anything.  Her husband had surgery 2 days before that so he is stuck in the hospital indefinitely.  I wish I could be there and help her take care of things but I can’t.  I have responsibilities here.

Another blow to me was the loss of a cousin from my mother’s side of the family.  He was 38 years young.  From what I was told, he died from congestive heart failure, most likely due to his weight even though he had lost a hundred pounds.  This scared me.  I think that is why I have been a little down since I got home from the funeral yesterday.  About 1/2 of the people there, both family and friends were overweight or obese.  There were more obese family members than obese friends.  This fact is hard for me to take.  My father’s side has also had some hefty people on it.  I have the deck stacked against me, genetically speaking.  I know that is a poor excuse but it is the truth.  I need to fight this and win for my daughter’s sake.  I don’t want to leave her motherless due to and early death and I want to teach her good habits by practicing them myself.  She is small for her age at this point, but then again, so was I at that age.

So here we go taking another step forward.  I say we because it needs to be a family effort.  There are only 2 adults here and one toddler but we can all work together towards a healthier life.




  1. I know the battle seems hard with family trends, traveling and the winter weather doesn’t really make things easy. You do need to focus more and put more thought and effort into you meal choices. I know it’s easier said than done but I know you well enough to know that you CAN do it. Keep trying.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: